Parking

I have been wanting to institute a parking policy here for awhile - there are a ton of cars parked in the parking lot that don't belong to residents, and a ton of cars that do belong to residents but that don't run, don't have any plates, or are otherwise illegal and /or useless.

I haven't started this parking policy yet because I have more pressing things to deal with, and before we can start enforcing it I will have to write a lease addendum, check with the proper authorities to make sure it's legal, and then all the tenants will have to come into the office and sign the lease addendum.

Today, the tenant who started the whole buzz about the old property manager stealing money was having a fit because she couldn't find a spot to park behind her building. Note: there are plenty of vacant parking spots, because only about half of the apartments are filled, there just weren't any behind her building. She got mad at another tenant in her building because they were taking up 2 parking spots (the tenant who yelled obscenely at me after I stuck a parking violation sticker on her car for parking illegally) , and you can imagine the shouting match that ensued. This occurred just as a prospective tenant was leaving my office after filling out an application. Awkward.... But, she's going to figure out the way of the neighborhood sometime. Better now before she goes through with the application process than after she forks over her money.

I thought to myself "I could go outside and tell then to stop fighting, but then they are just going to start yelling at me & want me to tell one of them that the other is wrong, and, to be honest, if they get carried away and one or both of them calls the cops my day will be much more interesting."

Sure enough, after they were done yelling first 1 then the other came into my office to complain about how the other was parking. I nod and sympathize and tell them about my plan for a parking policy, but refuse to assign parking stalls, which is what they both want.

My Least Favorite Part

I hate turning down people for apartments. Even though I know they won't pay their rent, they will be bad tenants, they will have problems with noise and traffic and the police and neighbors, it's my least favorite part of this job. Worse than evicting people.

Everyone needs a place to live. Everyone deserves a place to live. And in the sort of neighborhood I am in, if people don't get approved here, they probably won't get approved anywhere. Meaning that after this neighborhood, the next stop is living with a family member, in a shelter, or the street.

Ok, to be fair, there are plenty of scummy private landlords who will take them. but the rent will be twice as much.

I can't say I'll be surprised if I wind up addicted to pain killers. I hope the press is kinder to me than Rush Limbaugh. Oh, wait, I don't get any press. No worries, then.

The Funniest Thing I Have Ever Seen.

To this day, this remains 1 of the funniest things I have ever seen in my life. Ever.

It is appropriate for work (tho it contains swear words), but if you work in an office where people will wonder why you're cackling out loud at your computer screen / cackling out loud at your computer screen will give you away as surfing the net, you may want to wait until you get home. Or print it out and read it at home.

Extra fun: if you ride the bus, print it out, read it on the ride home, and guffaw like a crazy homeless person (albeit a nice-smelling one). I guarantee you'll have that bench all to yourself!


http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=irule

Ants

There's an ant infestation in my office (which is a vacant apartment). It makes me feel like there are bugs crawling all over me, sort of like when you find a tick on yourself and then feel "ghost ticks" crawling on you the rest of the day.

Ah, the Midwest.

We don't use the kitchen (except for the fridge) so I'm not sure where the ants are coming from / what they're attracted to. Maybe they can smell the higher than normal levels of sugar in my blood stream. Carnivore ants. Awesome.

…AND THE BAD PROPERTY MANAGER OF THE YEAR AWARD GOES TO:

A woman to whom I gave a 5-day notice for having the phone in her boyfriend’s name (Lease violation! All utilities must be in the name of an adult on the lease!) asked me what she was supposed to do because she can't get a phone in her name. I told her “don’t call the office from that phone”.